


The heart of the Universe

by Pixie_Weasel



Series: Something between Death and the Universe [1]
Category: Persona 3, Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, How Do I Tag, I just like shuake, M/M, Persona 3 Spoilers, Persona 5 Spoilers, Persona 5: The Royal Spoilers, Swearing, That's it, also, and its just Joker, it's the p3 ending, oh yeah, persona 5 elements only show up in the final chapter, shuake is one throw away line in the final chapter, there we go, you can ignore it if you want
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:47:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26683174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixie_Weasel/pseuds/Pixie_Weasel
Summary: “I’m so sorry Min.” Where the pressure of his evoker had sat so neatly in his hand, Minato now had Ryoji’s hand in his. From the look on his face as he said that, anyone would have thought Ryoji had been the one to kill him. Which he wasn’t, for clarification, but the seal did kind of take up a lot of his concentration so Ryoji could have just choked him from behind and he probably wouldn’t have noticed.Or: The Seal, Death, and the Trickster who wasn't going to let things lie.
Relationships: Arisato Minato/Mochizuki Ryoji, Mochizuki Ryoji/Persona 3 Protagonist, Mochizuki Ryoji/Yuuki Makoto, implied Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Something between Death and the Universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1945900
Comments: 17
Kudos: 92





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I actually have all of this written out, so I should put out a chapter a day.
> 
> You know, assuming I don't randomly decide I hate one of the chapters in the mean time.
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy whatever this thing is!

“I’m so sorry Min.” Where the pressure of his evoker had sat so neatly in his hand, Minato now had Ryoji’s hand in his. From the look on his face as he said that, anyone would have thought Ryoji had been the one to kill him. Which he wasn’t, for clarification, but the seal did kind of take up a lot of his concentration so Ryoji could have just choked him from behind and he probably wouldn’t have noticed.

With how much the seal hurt, he probably would have thanked him. 

It didn’t take a whole lot to figure out he was dead. The world around him was a void, bright and burning with a thousand stars with a veil of darkness that felt like peace – and if that wasn’t enough of a clue, the concept of Death was stood in front of him. It was fine, no matter how devastated Ryoji looked, he’d done this knowing he would die. This was just the end of his journey, his life against his friends – well, against the world, but against his friends really – had been an easy decision to make. 

And yet… “Not yet.” He slowly untangled his hand from Ryoji’s, ignoring how much it physically hurt when he wasn’t sure he’d ever see him again to begin with, refusing to back down at the guilt written clearly on the others face. 

“Min… there’s nothing I can do. I’m sorry.” Fingers that were too pale for somebody alive worried at the fraying ends of the scarf. He hasn’t seen Ryoji like this since he refused to kill him… well, he hasn’t seen Ryoji at all since he refused to kill him. “The door needs a seal… It’s your time, as much as I wish it wasn’t.”

“I can’t go yet.” When the burning sensation of tears on his face registered, it surprised him more than he’d like to admit. When was the last time he’d cried…? Ryoji’s eyes were filling with tears as well, his hands shaking as he brought them up to readjust his scarf. “Please Ryoji.” His voice never shook, and for once he kind of wished he could be more expressive with his voice. 

There was quiet for a minute, and the heartbreak on Ryoji’s face didn’t exactly bode well for what was to come. The void kept swirling around them, like somebody had spun the night sky and hung it out just for them. It was beautiful, in the sort of way a natural disaster could be beautiful. When Ryoji finally let out a sigh, his eyes almost snapped to attention from where they’d been wandering.

“The seal won’t take all your energy at once. It would cause you a lot less pain to go now, but hypothetically you could have more time. Just…” Ryoji’s eyes look like they’re back lit with the stars around them, and he wishes he could see them without the sadness pooling in the deep blue, “…you won’t have much.” 

“I don’t need a lot of time.” And Ryoji actually flinched at that one. Minato wishes he could do something to get rid of the guilt lining every inch of Ryoji’s face and colouring all of his actions. He wishes he could tell him it wasn’t his fault. But he was never good with words, so instead he just steadily holds Ryoji’s gaze, hoping somewhere in there the boy who'd deserved better than he'd got saw that he didn’t blame him for a single thing. 

“…I knew you’d say that.” Even with his mouth covered by the top of his scarf, Minato could tell whatever small smile had come with that line was tainted with grief. “You never would take the easy option I gave you.” The words themselves were bitter, but coming from Ryoji they were laced with a fondness that managed to make Minato smile a little. Nothing more than a tilt of his lips, but when’s his smile been anything more?

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Whatever grip this world of death where it was just him and Ryoji had on him was loosening, he could see the stars extinguishing out of the corner of his eye. Regardless of this, Minato took a step forward and buried his head in Ryoji’s shoulder, pretending not to notice when he felt the cold tears Ryoji had been holding in fall on his head. Strong arms wrapped around him and pulled him closer in, and Minato almost felt home. “I’ll see you soon, I guess.” His words were muffled by Ryoji’s shoulder, but from the sob above him he guesses Death heard him anyway.

“I wish you didn’t have to.” He couldn’t see any of the stars around them at this point, and something else was poking at his awareness, demanding he looked away. Almost as if he felt this, Ryoji loosened his grip, pulling back to let Minato go. “I wish you could live forever Min. But at the same time, I can’t wait to see you again. Does that make me selfish?” 

The pulsing at the corner of his vision was too strong now for him to answer, and from the smile on his face Ryoji knew that. “I love you Min.” 

His tongue was lead and he couldn’t even see anymore, but he so desperately wanted to tell Ryoji that he loved him too, that none of this was his fault, that he wasn’t selfish and he wanted to see him again too-

Minato woke up with a pain in his heart that nearly matched the way his whole body was screaming for him to lie down and never wake up again.


	2. Chapter 2

Ryoji hadn’t been kidding when he said slowly dying like this would cause him a lot of pain. Waking up was a struggle, and his habit of napping had practically turned into him being narcoleptic, his legs gave way under him so often he could barely make his way around the school, and some days he could have sworn he saw Ryoji hovering just at the edge of his vision.

But the others hadn’t remembered yet. He could hold out until then. He could hold out until he could look them in the eyes and have them see him instead of the kid who just lived in the same dorms as them, until not just Junpei and Yukari were the only ones looking at him like he was a friend, then he could say good bye, then he would-

“Minato, I swear if you’re on the floor in there again I’m taking you to a doctor!” Unfortunately, that was not right now. Currently he was in fact on the floor again, his legs gave way under him as he tried to get over to the door of his dorm room and he didn’t have the strength to push himself back up again, and Yukari was threatening to take him to another doctor who’d say he was fine because this kind of death wasn’t exactly science friendly. 

“I’m fine. Just start going to school without me.” He says, like he’d make it there at all in the state he’s in at the moment. Apparently Yukari realised this as well, because instead of doing what he’d so politely asked, she barged down the door and forcibly picked him up off the floor and dumped him on the bed. 

“You are definitely not fine! Just go to sleep, you can’t keep going to school like this!”

“I-“ _I think if I go to sleep now I’ll never wake up again_ “I’m fine to go to school.” If Yukari noticed the way he stuttered on the first part of that, she didn’t show it. Throwing her hands up, she shot him a nasty glare and turned to walk out of his room.

“Fine! But its your funeral.” He thinks he hears some kind of strangled sob coming from the side of him, but when he turns to look he barely even catches a flash of yellow. “Me and Junpei are waiting downstairs. If your so insistent you’re fine, be quick.” Her face softened a little bit after she finished talking, and she added, “but hey, there’s no harm in staying behind. The only important thing happening today is the third years graduation anyway.” 

Third year graduation. That was today? They were supposed to meet on the roof… to see that the others had remembered. With Aigis gone, he wonders if he’s going to be the only one there. (A more morbid part of his brain wonders if he’ll die up there alone.)

“I’ll be there in a minute.” Yukari lets out a sigh and looks to the ceiling like it holds the answers to his stupidity at that, but she doesn’t say anything else as she turns to walk downstairs and, with stumbling steps and too much weight leaned on the wall, he follows along just behind.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The walk to school was worse than usual that day. Junpei had to stop him from falling down several times, to the point at the end he was just keeping an arm firmly fixed around Minato’s shoulders. For once, he didn’t complain about his personal space; he knew he couldn’t stand anymore without him.

The school day was worse than usual as well. It was a fight to stay awake the whole time, some primal part of his brain screaming at him that if he did he’d never wake up, he’d lose, that closing his eyes was a danger he couldn’t face just yet. Several times he could have sworn he saw Ryoji stood at his side, or the flash of Aigis’s hair outside one of the school windows, but one of those was impossible and the other an omen of death, so he tried to ignore them both like the sane and healthy person he was not. At the end of the school day, when everyone else was pouring into the hall, he walked off towards the stairs, ignoring the confused shouts from Yukari and Junpei behind him.

They didn’t follow him there. He’s not sure why he thought they would.

The first thing he does is nearly faceplant the first step, hand railings not enough to stop his legs from crumpling under his own weight. He just about has time to think that this would be a horrible way to go out after almost a month of a slow and painful demise when a hand found its way across his chest to prop him up. A cold, metal hand.

Looking up, he’s met with Aigis’s bright blue eyes staring down at him, a fondness and worry in them that makes his heart ache for a different pair of blue. Still, its good to see Aigis. It’s… been awhile. 

“Do you remember?” Her voice sounds oddly hopeful, but at the same time like she can’t bring herself to believe it. He tries to nod, but he’s not quite sure how effective it is considering how moving anything right now feels like trying to stop the weight of the world from crushing him.

“Have the whole time.” Did his voice sound that hoarse this morning? It both sounds and feels like he’s spent the whole day rubbing sandpaper down his throat. Aigis clearly notices from the way her eyes seem to flash, and if her hand tightening a little bit is any indication he’d guess her check of his vitals wasn’t looking so good. That’s fine, he just had to make it up there and wait for the others now. Then he could rest. “Can you help me up there?” 

Aigis, whatever her doubts may have been about his health or the others remembering, simply nodded, picking him up and holding him close to her as she carried him up the stairs. The light up there was blinding, but he could just make out the drift of cherry blossoms through the wind. Huh, so he’d get to keep his promise to see them with Aigis after all… He almost closes his eyes in the moment, just barely forcing them back open when he hears a strangled “No!” coming from next to him, and Ryoji’s wide eyes meet his with a profound amount of grief and a tired sort of acceptance. Huh, he must be closer to deaths door than he thought if he was properly seeing Ryoji now. “Just a little longer Min. Hang in there for them, okay?” He gave a hum to show he’d heard, too tired to do anything else and not wanting to worry Aigis anyway.

“It’s finally over.” Aigis started talking, dragging his attention back up to her. It took that for him to notice she was sat down now, with him lying with his head in her lap, and Ryoji gripping his hand, though he knew he was the only one who could see him. “I’ve… I’ve decided what I’m going to live for. I’m going to live for you Minato.” And oh, if that didn’t make his heart hurt in a completely different way. He might have thought she was expecting to live that life with him, if this didn’t sound like a speech you’d give at a funeral, like the last words you’d want a dear family member to hear. “And… you won’t have to worry about us anymore. We’ll all be just fine, all of us at SEES.” In the distance he could hear the sound of footsteps, calling voices too joined together for him to differentiate, but he knew who each of them was anyway. “They remembered.” Aigis’s voice held awe beyond the sadness colouring it earlier, and her hand slipped easily into his hair. “See? We’ll be okay. You can rest now. I’ll still be here when you wake up.” 

And as much as he wanted to see the rest of his friends one last time, his eyes were heavy and he’d long since lost feeling in the rest of his body. Trying his best for the last thing Aigis saw of him to be a smile, he closed his eyes and let himself drift away.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“…Did I do good enough?”

“Oh Min, you’d already done amazing.”

“I love you too Ryoji, by the way.”

“I know. I love you as well.”


	3. Epilogue

Minato woke up to a rich, multi-layered voice screaming “You think I’m afraid to kill a god _again_?” which just may be the most confusing thing he’s ever woke up to. 

Oh, he’s also pretty sure he’s still supposed to be dead, so the waking up bit is fairly confusing as well. 

“Come at me you overgrown goat bitch!” …he has no clue what’s going on out there at this point. He would open his eyes, but he’s pretty sure he’s still in the seal, even if he is conscious, so there’s probably not a point. Though if he is still in the seal, being properly conscious for a bit feels like some kind of cruel joke. 

Then there came horrific screams like something inhumane was being burned alive. That was probably a cue to at least try to look… so he opened one eye. …That actually worked, but faced with a giant being he’s fairly sure was meant to be a persona but just as easily could have been something more like the Nyx avatar, a screaming teenager in a leather coat, and a giant goat demon he’s pretty sure had just been attacking the seal burning in a ring of bright blue fire with a bullet hole through his head, all floating in the same void of night and stardust where he’d truly died what felt like an age ago, Minato shut his eye again. That’s cool and all, but he’s only just been reanimated or whatever is going on here, so he should probably figure that out first. 

“Ummm… Min?” …only one person calls him Min, and that person should be alive even less than he should... and that person is definitely worth opening his eyes for. Since the familiar voice was coming from behind him, he turned his head to find the concept of Death himself holding his wrists where previously they’d been chained to a cross. They were also apparently on the floor now. Funny how these things work. “Hi?” Ryoji’s smile was nervous, confused, and incredibly shocked, which about summed all this up, and he made no move to try and release Minato’s wrists, which would be great if he wasn’t being held in the worlds most uncomfortable position for his arms. Still, he didn’t say anything. He’s pretty sure his brain hasn’t quite caught up to all this yet, but seeing Ryoji here, alive, was making something burn in his chest, and as uncomfortable of a position as this was, so long as it was with Ryoji maybe it wasn’t so bad. 

“Oh there’s two of you.” If he has to keep turning his head for new voices he’s going to give up and stare off into the void of space, regardless of who's speaking. Standing in front of him was the teenager in a trench coat, minus the giant abomination that had been behind him burning the goat demon alive earlier. That also seemed to put his voice back at a normal cadence, so that was interesting. Kind of. “Hello not dead people, it’s nice to meet you?” Not even the kid himself sounded exactly sure on what he was saying, and just had a look of ‘this wasn’t part of the plan’ written on his face. Minato took the time to actually look at him before saying anything, not really caring if Ryoji picked up the conversations slack like he used to. His hair was an absolute mess and looked like he’d just woke up, which he probably didn't look much better, but he had the excuse of having been dead. The general posture had more confidence than even Mitsuru had when they’d been exploring Tartarus, and the sharp glint he could see behind the eyes beyond the fancy dress mask implied it wasn’t totally baseless.

That didn’t change the fact he also looked like life had never made sense and yet he still expected it to, which was an amateur move when faced with weirdness. Lose the hope, makes things easier. 

Anyway, Ryoji was not speaking – and still hadn’t moved yet, how about that – so Minato tried to have a conversation. “Hey.” Already going fantastic. He’s years out of practice and probably both dead and slightly hysterical… or as hysterical as he can get with his emotional range.

“So one of you is Minato, and I’m going to take a wild guess and say it’s you based of the description I got.” Trench coat vaguely gestured at him, which means he at least has some clue what’s going on. What he did, why he’s here and why Minato isn’t dead are no closer to being solved. “But I’ve got no clue who you are.” He vaguely gestured at Ryoji, but he had a knife in his hand so some people would probably take it as somewhat threatening. 

Ryoji actually let go of his wrists at that and moved to stand next to Minato, fiddling with the ends of his scarf. The fact Ryoji would only drop his wrists to carry on his habit of worrying his scarf to death is not surprising, but there is a little bit of fondness attached to the thought. “I’m Death.” Ryoji’s voice was quiet, and Minato both gets why he led with that, and wishes he’d started with his actual name. Ryoji is so much more than just Death, but Minato’s told Ryoji that enough times that he’s probably never going to believe it if he doesn’t already, so he doesn’t bother saying it. Instead, he just lightly bounces his head off Ryoji’s shoulder in an attempt at comfort while Ryoji braced himself like he was waiting for the shot from the gun he was just now noticing Trench Coat had strapped to his side.

A shot that never came, instead just a wild grin that was almost as concerning. “Nice to meet you Death, I’m Satan.” 

“…I’m not joking you know.”

“Well neither am I, so that works out?” Well that’s interesting.

“Cool. His names Ryoji by the way.” Because he refused to let Ryoji not get actually introduced, and Ryoji clearly wasn’t going to do it, he introduced him himself. Apparently-Satan just bursts out laughing at the response, while Ryoji drops his head further into his scarf.

“Are we not going to talk about this?” Ryoji’s voice was a little higher pitched than usual, but there was also a touch of laughter he hadn’t heard since before Ryoji remembered he was Death. It was nice. He’s trying not to get caught thinking in how much he’d missed it. 

“He’s Satan, you’re Death, I’m the Universe. That’s about it.” His voice came out as flat as ever, but from the sigh next to him he can tell Ryoji caught the amusement. “Do you have a name other than Satan?” That one was directed towards Trench Coat Satan, so he cocked his head in the general direction. Trench Coat was still doubled over laughing, but he stuck his hand that wasn’t clutching a knife out after he managed to regain some control over himself. 

“Call me Joker, and thank your attendant for me coming to get you Mr Universe.” Even though Joker was smiling while he said it, the reminder of why Minato was here to begin with sobered Ryoji up imminently. 

“Not that I’m not grateful you saved him, but… how? And why am I here?” Ryoji’s face was vanishing into his scarf as he said that, staring at his hands like he still wasn’t quite sure if they were real. Minato tapped the back of one in the hopes that it might help a bit, and Ryoji grabbed it before he could retreat. Well, looks like they’re holding hands now.

…He missed this too.

He’s pretty sure he sees some kind of grief flash across Joker’s face looking at their intertwined hands, but it’s gone too quick to be sure. Plus even if it was, if Joker’s lost somebody that’s not his business. What he has to say next is.

“Ah well, I’m technically a god?” Joker flaps his hand in the air after saying that before he or Ryoji can interject, and Minato lets him speak because he’s still flapping with the knife hand. “Phrased poorly, I’m not a god that would be eww.” Joker shivered like the idea was making him ill, and that was the moment Minato decided he liked Joker. “I just killed a god, then defeated my therapist who had gained the powers of said god, and now I have aforementioned godly powers – save your questions for the end, it gets weirder!” Joker points the knife specifically at Ryoji, which honestly must be a pretty effective way of getting people to stay quiet. Or he’s just forgot he’s holding the knife. Equally likely it’s intentional to unintentional. “But my godly powers are basically useless unless I want to become a mass dictator of cognition, which I’ll be honest isn’t really the plan. Or if I want to kill gods, which I’m much more on board for, but there’s apparently a limited supply of evil gods, so god slayers off the table as an immediate career plan. But then a crazy blue lady showed up at my attic and told me I could save a life.” He pulled a face after that. “Well, more accurately she scared the shit out of me by appearing out of thin air and refused to leave until I agreed to help without giving me any details.”

Yeah, that was definitely Elizabeth. Also that was a lot of rambling. 

“So, now I’m here, using mass cognition to kill peoples will to die, which is kind of cool now that I stop to think about it.” Joker's voice trailed off towards the end as he seemed to stop to think about that. Huh, so that probably explained why Minato was out the seal. Probably. If there was nothing trying to break down the door, he didn’t need to be there. 

“That still doesn’t explain why I’m here.” Ryoji’s voice was tentative, and his one free hand was still worrying away at his scarf. 

Joker just shrugged. “My best guess is you were a part of whatever that thing was as well.” 

“You mean the seal?”

“Yes, that thing!” Joker did finger guns with his one hand before dropping it into his pocket, knife hand still hanging at his side. Ryoji had a kind of amazed confusion mixed with concern on his face, and Joker was smirking like he knew exactly what was going on even after saying that and proving he very much didn't. Joker could match Junpei in baseless confidence.. 

Ryoji suddenly tensing was all the warning they got before everything around them seemed to start to be consumed by a crawling emptiness. Joker let out a noise most comparable to that squirrel Akihiko had punched, and looked about ready to throw his dagger and hope it hit something and fixed this, but there wasn’t really a need to worry. This had happened the last time Minato had just about dodged death.

…hopefully this time it stuck for a little longer. 

“See you around, Satan.” He barely even whispered it, but Joker’s eyes immediately snapped to his. Both his and Ryoji’s lack of panic were apparently enough to curb at least some of the immediate worry, as even with his eyes still wild, Joker shot them a grin.

“Drop by Leblanc in Tokyo if you ever have the time! That goes for you to Death.” Ryoji startled a bit at being addressed, especially as Death, but gave a small smile regardless. 

“Sure… if I’m still around.” The last part was too quiet for Joker to have heard, but Minato did and he practically crushed Ryoji’s hand in his. He didn’t say anything though. He was never exactly good with words. He hopes Ryoji got the reassurance anyway. 

The last thing Minato saw was a vague outline of blue before everything vanished around him.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
Funny how Gekkoukan’s roof was just how he left it. There was even still the bench he died on, how about that. He was still lying down as well, the exact same position he’d been in when he died. All that was missing was Aigis.

…The sky was kind of beautiful. Red crept just around the edges of where the sun hung, staining the space around it pink like a blush in a way he’s not sure he’d ever noticed before – and that blue flooding the sky was so much brighter than he remembered, tears of white streaked through as the clouds floated idly past. There were no cherry blossoms to float past this time on the roof, but the gentle light of the sun was almost better, warming everything around him. He forgot the comfortable warmth that came from just being alive, like having a spluttering candle clutched close in his chest. He’d missed it. A lot more than he would have thought if you'd asked the him before SEES how much he'd miss life if he died. 

Now he’s just being too sentimental. Pushing himself up, he’s suddenly reminded that he’s not the only one who should be here. “Ryoji-“

Before he could finish calling out for Ryoji, he was wrapped up in a flash of yellow, arms holding him close. “I missed this. I missed you.” Ryoji’s voice was muffled from where his head was lost in a maze made of Minato’s hair and probably Ryoji’s scarf as well, but he could still hear him. And even though they’d been trapped in the seal together for who knows how long, Minato knew exactly what he meant. Returning the hug for once, he buried his head into Ryoji’s shoulder.

“Same.” He could have sworn he heard Ryoji let out a laugh at his attitude, but it could just as easily be a smothered sob of relief, so he doesn’t say anything. 

“You’re really here… I’m really here.” At this point he knows it was a sob, because Ryoji’s grip around him tightens almost as much as his voice did over the last few words. 

They were alive. By whatever miracle, they were still here. Even he couldn’t stop a small smile at the thought.

“Yeah. We’re back.” His voice doesn't crack like Ryoji's did, but it comes close enough for him. 

…He’s going to get to see his friends again, he’s going to get scolded by Mitsuru again, he’s going to get Akihiko asking him where he’s been and never waiting for an answer, he’s going to get Junpei never respecting his personal space, Yukari teasing and snapping at him, Ken trying to be more grown up than he was, Aigis, Koromaru, Fuuka, all the others who weren’t apart of SEES. He’s going to get to see them all again. He’s going to get to do it with Ryoji there. He’s going to get to live again.

He’s almost waiting for the catch. Ryoji drags him out of that train of thought pretty quick. 

“Come on Min… let’s find your friends.” Despite saying that, Ryoji made no move to let go, and Minato wasn’t going to rush. Not just yet.

Let him enjoy this part of his home for a few moments longer before he went to find the others. SEES would hopefully still be there after a moment or two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well would you look at that, I'm actually kind of happy with this! It may have only been a three chapter thing, but thank you so much if you've read all the way through, I really appreciate it!
> 
> I'd be down to make this into a series with a few one shots of different moments before, during and after this fic takes place, if people would want to read that? I've got a few ideas for it that didn't fit into these three chapters, things like writing the scene where Elizabeth gets Jokers help, or Minato visiting his own grave.


End file.
